I don't know what the hell is getting into me. See usually I am very collected about myself. I go out, attend to my own stuff, come back home, rest and get ready to conquer another day. I don't report to anyone and I don't have to take care of anyone but myself (which is relatively low maintenance) I can't sleep on selective nights, which is fine by me. I get work done, I'm happy.
I cannot structure my life around someone else's. I get worried when you don't reply instantly (like I sometimes am guilty of, but apparently I am a hypocrite that way) and giggle like an idiot when I receive funny messages. I don't actually have any feedback to stunningly sweet compliments, which disturbs me because it makes me feel like I am made of straw.
I don't know what to do. One minute I feel like maybe I should get over this fear, but the next I'm convinced this is all going to hell. You tell me that I should stop being scared, or stop worrying, and I trust you, but it's not making much of a difference now is it? My head works all the time, sometimes when I wake up an idea is fully formed in my mind.
I can't break up over something that never was, but I do not want to lose out on the nicest thing that's happened to me.
0 comments:
Post a Comment